Relief

Last week I fired my doctor. My rheumatologist whom I have been seeing for almost 10 years. It was a really hard decision, we had a relationship, it was like breaking up with someone. You know all their faults, all their blessings, why they are good for you, why they are bad for you; yet it is still difficult.

In this case, it should have been open and shut. I should have left years ago, but I could not. I could not waste the time to find a new doctor, I kept thinking I should give him one more chance, one more chance to change for the better. But he never did.

The major issues were:

1. I was treated as if I had the plague, he stayed across the room and never came near me
   
2. I had to remind him about health decisions he made about me in our last meeting, when he had his written notes in front of him
3. I was being lectured about health care reform and how he was going to go broke, etc because of it
4. and most importantly, any discussion regarding potential pregnancies was disregarded as null, since I am an unwed woman

See, open and shut. Why did I not run screaming sooner? Why did I stay? Especially, when I live in an area with choices of doctors? Comments of laziness, scaredness, worry of change all come up.

Now that it is done, I feel relief. And excitement. About what the next doctor will be like and how that will affect my health, my life.

Grumbles Out Of Bed

Stayed up way too late last night, working on a new quilt. Almost finished the top. Have one more seam to go, well, must rip it out first, then re-sew.

Ended up getting up early to have a nice productive day at both work and home. But realizing that after 5 hours of sleep and a rather un-productive morning, it may not have been worth it. Plus grumpy because my hands have decided to be purple today.

Oh yeah, I brought my quilt in to work today, so that I could use my down time to rip out the one row. And I forgot the seam ripper on the kitchen table.

I should just go back to bed.

PHARMACY SMASH!!!

Sorry, I guess this is a rant. But after spending over a week hunting down the prescription for the Rituxan. I am very very annoyed!

It really is a simple process. Doctor gives you a prescription, you get it filled. For this, there are a few extra steps, but not too many.

• Must get health insurance pre-approval = CHECK
• Doctor faxes approved prescription to pharmacy = CHECK (done last week)
• I follow up and pharmacy mails me said prescription = NOT CHECK

The pharmacy did not get the fax! They have not got the fax now 4 times! Yesterday they FINALLY received the fax, said someone will call me back that afternoon to schedule delivery. Today, still no call. So I call back. Guess what!?!? Because of the type of health insurance I have and the type of treatment, the doctor has to order the drug from the manufacturer! WHAT?! At that moment, when I heard that, I felt as if I was Linda Blair and my head was beginning to spin.

How long is this going to take now? Delivery from the manufacturer? The doctor must order it? All of my PLANNING has gone out the window. And of course, the doctors office is on lunch when I find this out. So now I must wait for them to call me back. They are really beginning to love me there. Can you fill this form out, now can you make this call...

Scheduling the start of the treatment is not a problem as long as I give 24 hours notice, but they only do treatments Tuesday through Thursday. So what's a girl to do???

I really want to start treatment next week.

I want to get better.

I want to get better...

Frustrated in waiting