A Good Scare

Rituxan treatment yesterday. As the treatment was finishing up, I started to lose feeling in my arms and legs. It was a weird feeling. It is hard to describe. The areas between my elbow and hand on both arms and between my knee and foot on both legs, had a strange pressure sensation. It felt as if that part of the body was not there. I could walk and use my hands, there was no signs of a lack of circulation in my fingers or toes. It was a strange paralysis that would occasionally creep further.

I was worried enough to call the on-call doctor at the clinic, and luckily my doc was on call. He was definitely concerned as this is not a typical side effect with the drugs I was given yesterday. And I was told to go to the emergency if it proceeded to get worse and did not show signs of relief by morning. What a scare!

Over time, the feeling of paralysis left my legs and by morning it had left my arms. Now I am left with a tingling sensation running up and down my arms, from shoulder to fingertips.

I am scared. The lack of sensation, the lack of control that came with my temporary paralysis was unnerving. I am planning on calling the neurologist next week to see what is going on. His secretary probably already thinks I am crazy, as I kept calling her last week to get some information. Oh well. This call needs to happen. Crazy or not.

As scared and worried as I am, I am really thankful for what I do have, for the life I still can live, for the strength and functionality I still have in my body, for the love of my bf and my family and friends. Yesterday I was just reminded how quickly it can all go away. So tonight I am going to celebrate life with friends. And continue this celebration as long as I can.

I still have a lot left to live for!

Strength and Inspiration

As I am sitting here, reading others blogs, I came across a posting by RA Guy which was all about strength and inspiration. He had a face-to-face meet with a woman who has lived with RA and was willing to share her stories, the good and the bad. So check out his post Wonder Woman, My Mentor.

It is a good read. Definitely inspiring to all who have any struggles, no matter what size.